adventures in stalking

So I've tried a couple different strategies of stalking. On Friday i got on the train and decided i would just pick someone out and follow them. i spotted a woman in a bright red hat because i figured it would be easy to keep an eye on her. we were on the A-train and rode it downtown from 125th (where i got on, she was already on the train) to 34th st. at this point we got off the train and started walking towards the empire state building. after about 3 blocks she went inside an office building. i went to follow but got stopped by security. i needed an ID to get into the building and the woman with the red hat was out of my life forever.

i still had some time so i decided to pick another random person off the street. this was a guy who might possibly have been 7 ft tall. i followed him to Starbucks where he emerged with a large coffee beverage. he too then went into an office building and security shut me out once more.

i decided stalking in midtown on Friday mornings is not a good plan

so on Saturday i was at the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens for the Making Brooklyn Bloom day of events. It was pouring rain and as I waited for my partner to arrive I decided to stalk a couple walking though the park. It was cold, windy and gray and I felt like I was in a movie playing the role of the cheated on girlfriend, 007, or the creeper stalker. I felt really weird taking pictures but i snapped this one on my cell phone I guess just as proof that i did this. I was really nervous that they would hear my phone take the picture because its obnoxiously loud. I was nervous the entire time that they would get wise and figure me out as we were basically the only people in the park and I had a giant umbrella so i wasn't exactly dressed in camo. i stayed maybe 20 ft away (i have no idea really, i'm bad with guessing distances).

I felt awkward because they were obviously a couple being "couplely" holding hands, stopping to kiss at a particularly attractive tree and i felt like i was totally violating their private space but they were in public so then i thought its free game. which freaked me out to think of people who watch me in public. i think what this assignment did was to make me feel incredibly paranoid that maybe i have a stalker! i think i'll become a hermit.